


The Case Of The Missing Elf

by CaptainRivaini



Category: Dragon Age (Video Games), Dragon Age - All Media Types, Dragon Age: Inquisition
Genre: F/F, Humor, Lots of horns
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-08-01
Updated: 2014-08-01
Packaged: 2018-02-11 09:39:04
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,195
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2063205
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/CaptainRivaini/pseuds/CaptainRivaini
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Beatrix Adaar finds herself with a slight problem and honestly? It's probably all Vivienne's fault.</p>
            </blockquote>





	The Case Of The Missing Elf

**Author's Note:**

> Beatrix does not belong to me, but to asexualhawke on Tumblr. I really hope I did her justice, I felt like writing her and Vivienne together after that lovely scenario we spoke about.

“We have a situation that needs to be addressed Inquisitor,” Cassandra said one morning at breakfast, standing up as she spoke so that she could be seen over the Iron Bull's larger stature and even larger horns, “as soon as humanely possible.”

Varric let out a low whistle, “should all non-humans just pile out while we can or are you going to try and fit in another subtle insult in as soon as possible?”

Beatrix Adaar resisted the urge to smile and luckily found herself able to do so once she caught eye on how serious Cassandra looked, almost desperate in fact. It was enough to make her sigh as she settled herself more comfortably in her seat and leaned in to whisper something into Josephine Montilyet's ear, soon later the adviser had done just what Varric had jokingly suggested and all non-humans quickly departed the room with Iron Bull in particular shouting crude obscenities as he went.

Cassandra herself looked rather surprised, “I didn't expect you to send them out like that, it was unnecessary.”

“I did so because I know the situation you're about to address and it seems fitting to me to have humans in particular discuss the subject of Sera being missing from Skyhold since yesterday,” Beatrix commented to bet met with several scoffs, the loudest being from Dorian who rolled his eyes at the Inquisitor's intended slight to them all, “WE are the Inquisition yes, but I have seen prejudice even in my time with the Chantry and I want a full report from all of you before the day ends on where Sera is.”

Dorian again rolled his eyes but Beatrix only had to meet his again to make him pause and bow his head slightly, even if somewhat sarcastically, “ _Inquisitor_ , you know we live to please.”

Beatrix cleared her throat and one by one each of them left; Blackwall first, swearing sombrely that he wouldn't rest until he found Sera to present her in front of Beatrix, then Cullen and Josephine both left (clearly working together, how typical) with a speed that suggested they had a few ideas on where the bothersome elf could have gotten to, Dorian following to catch up with them, Cassandra too until all that was left was...

“I do not perform errands without some reward for it,” Vivienne said rather bluntly, shrugging at the look of perplexity that had crossed the other woman's face even as the mage sat down to continue finishing her breakfast, “and darling, with all honesty? It seems obvious to me where Sera is, and where is the challenge in that?”

Beatrix tried to fight the blush that was creeping its way on her by taking a huge bite of her lip, eyes following Vivienne's every movement and how no matter how hard she tried to understand this woman she honestly couldn't find the right way to fully grasp the concept of doing so. Vivienne was a puzzle to her, an extremely frustrating one but one she cared for very much.

Then she grasped onto what Vivienne said and her thoughts came to a halt.

“You know where Sera is?”

Vivienne spooned a sliver of chopped boiled egg into her mouth, chewing slowly and using her finger to swirl her toast around to dip into the yolk she seemingly pondered on her answer with a look on her face that had Beatrix mesmerized, feeling utterly and ridiculously like she had stepped into something with the Iron Lady that she would not be getting out of just as easily.

“Vivienne?” She questioned again, getting up from her own seat at the table to stand in front of the First Enchanter's, hands pressed to the oak carvings on top of the table in order to ground herself and perhaps maybe to stop her knees from shaking a little when Vivienne's brown eyes glanced up at her in an imperious manner.

It was that look however that made a sudden thought appear right to the front of her mind, or should she say, a sudden realization.

“Not the horn room...” And when Vivienne smiled in between taking a small sip of her goblet Beatrix let out a long suffering groan which the Enchanter only found even more amusing, “Vivienne that room...there have been numerous complaints and Sera-”

“-Was sneaking around my room again, and like I have warned her and everyone else before,” Vivienne started, finally finishing her breakfast and promptly standing up where her horned hat only just about met the height of Beatrix's nose, “that doing so will have consequences. She didn't listen and now. Well, even I have my own way of amusing myself.”

Beatrix allowed a genuinely worried look overcome her expression and with another sigh she pinched the bridge of her nose and shook her head, her horns starting to ache at the tension that had settled over her at the numerous complaints she would get from Sera _alone_ if what she thought had happened _had_ actually occurred right under nose.

“Did you put her up there?” She asked eventually once she was done with trying not to blow a gasket at the weeks of complaining she would be sure to put up when it came to Sera, enough that it would definitely test the patience she had developed since her time spent in the Chantry.

“I amused myself but I wasn't _childish,_ dear.”

The sound of yelping and screams of delight soon followed after a moment or two of silence between Beatrix and the First Enchanter, preceded by whooping and loud curses as well as the scream of 'I WAS TRAPPED THERE FOR A WHOLE DAY! Nobody comes in that blasted room because of the spikes! I WAS HANGING OFF ONE!'

Vivienne took another sip of her goblet, “it seems like the elf was found. Miracle of miracles, from what I guess, she was up very high.”

Beatrix arched a brow, “Vivienne we honestly need to speak about that horn room – it's no coincidence that the rise of elfroot bath scrubs and ointments have increased since we installed it.”

The First Enchanter's response was to merely purse her lips before looking at her pointedly, “Inquisitor it is no fault of mine that people are not limber enough to avoid the horns, and besides that? I believe you rightly agreed to the inclusion of the room once you heard that they are now all the fashion in Orlais and that you did not want to be outbid regardless of the peculiar taste.”

Beatrix remembered alright, but now she was just thinking that Vivienne had coerced her into it by commenting that it would remind her of her own horns in order to win her favour and well...Vivienne wasn't really wrong on that matter was she?

A loud knock came at the door which had been shut by Cassandra.

“I HAVE A COMPLAINT TO MAKE!” Sera bellowed.

Beatrix met eyes with the mage in front of her, wondering vaguely why she was so besotted with this woman enough she would actually be willing to take the fall for her.

It must be something in the water.

 


End file.
